Fishing

yourplayersaidwhat:

So, this was our very first game. (It is still ongoing, this was during our latest session.)

I, a Vegan Goliath Fighter and my friend, an Atheist Human Cleric, and our DM. All of us our first game.

DM: “As you exit the woods you see 3 houses on the shore and a pier. It appears to be a small fishing settlement.”

Me, OOC: “Hey, I have a Nature of 2, can I try to make a fishing rod with a Nature roll?”

DM and Cleric, OOC: “Out of what?”

Me, OOC: “You know, twigs and stuff on the ground.”

DM: “Sigh, fine, roll nature”

Natural 20.

DM: “Goddammit.. Well, you run around the woods, collecting twigs and after working a bit with it, you somehow have an improvised fishing rod.”

We’re all laughing.

Me: “Can I roll Survival to find some bugs to use as bait?”

DM: “Sure, I guess.”

Natural 20.

DM: “What the fuck.. Anyway, [Cleric] looks at you, weirded out by the fact that you are running around, digging through the dirt, and you somehow find a group of 10 worms and you take them all.”

Me: “I go to the pier to fish.”

Cleric: “You’re not gonna come with me to check out the houses?”

Me: “Nope.”

DM: “You go to the pier. Roll survival for fishing.”

Natural 1.

We all die of laughter for a solid 5 minutes.

DM: “You throw out the line, and, Oh wow! There something huge! You get pulled into the water and hit your head on the rocks that your hook caught.”

Me: “I wanna try again.”

Natural 1 again

DM: “You attempt to cast out the line again, but in the motion of trying to cast it out, you fall face first onto the pier and into the water again.”

I let the cleric try.

Natural 20.

We all die of laughter as he catches a fish larger than himself and my character starts crying.